The Kitchen of Theseus

My job is slowly becoming more modern as it goes along. Sometimes it’s purchasing an iPad that we never use, sometimes it’s adding chip readers to the cash registers so that the half-imagined epidemic of semi-fast-food employees frisking their customer’s credit information is finally put to an end, and sometimes it’s adapting its look to more modern sensibilities (though the phrase “Noodles from all over the world and one from Wisconsin” continues to be the opposite of funny). Now, finally, we’ve moved on to the kitchen, which has its own set of issues.

Logistically, it’s a nightmare. Certain things just can’t be made without access to an oven, or are at least more difficult to prepare. Without a grill, well, you have to take the “grilled” out of “grilled chicken” for example. And a lot of this is done through contract work, which is apparently poorly negotiated. Materials take forever to arrive (rumor is that this is a purposeful action, but I’ve yet to see any evidence), which means that instead of coming into work and seeing a new kitchen appliance, it’s entirely possible to see a printout with “We are undergoing renovations. Unfortunately we cannot serve chicken or potstickers at this time. Thank you for your understanding.”

Am I complaining about work again? I mean, some of this thought is based in negative thinking, yes. But it’s not like I want to deal with outdated equipment, and it’s not like the solution is immediately obvious either (I don’t think shutting down the store for a day to replace the kitchen entirely is something upper management would find particularly palatable, for example).

The weird thing is, I don’t think we’re losing that many customers over this, either. I mean, one or two groups have up and left because we didn’t have the meat they were looking for, but there seems to be the same amount of people each shift that there had been before these changes started happening, and the people that have left still end up coming back eventually. So maybe the only people really inconvenienced by these changes are the employees. And it’s certainly easier to inconvenience seven people than one hundred and seven.

-F